Attack The Block

Ok, first off I think the comparisons between The Goonies and Attack The Block end at the fact that their both about a group of kids,but the hype behind this film is in no way unfounded. Bringing plenty of action and a very unique alien design, Attack, is most definitely worth a watch. Nick Frost is great as a lazy,greasy, pot dealer and John Boyega is great as the street smart Moses. Again I gotta say these aliens are well done. Their basically just big gorilla sized masses of fur with a giant maw stuffed full of teeth. Director Joe Cornish likened the creature creation process to that of the early films of Ralph Bakshi, which I think works very well. Attack The Block has the Awesome Gruesome seal of approval!!!!

Things

I dont really know how to describe what I just experienced. I know I liked it, but thats only because I am part of a rare species that enjoys films like Corpse Eaters or Nightbeast or any of Don Dohlers wonderful catalog. Things is an experience. A non stop train wreck to good to look away from. The super 8 embodiment of cult. The erie mellow synthesizer music by the band Stryk-9 still haunts me. Canada should be proud. Thats all I can say at this point. I know that I am planning on buying a copy of Intervision's extras loaded DVD transfer of the film. I need to watch this again.

Seeding Of A Ghost a.k.a Zhong Gui (Asian Zombie Series Pt 3)

Rarely do you see a ghost make love to a floating zombie..am I right? Well at least I rarely do. Its even more rare to witness a ghost make love to a zombie who he previously raped in his human form when he was alive.. oh have I lost you? Dont worry it all makes sense at the end when the red tentacle monster, with the fangs and retractable biting baby head that shoots out of its mouth blasts out that pregnant bitches stomach. To be honest Im going to have watch this again,,,you know cuz of the awesomeness.

-recommended

--tips--
fast forward through the rape scene, cuz homie dont play dat.

The Thing (2011 Prequel)

I was fully prepared to rip this film to shreds if it was anything less than exceptional, but I cant do that. I loved it to be honest. Its a film made solely for the hardcore fans, may be the first of its kind. Matthijs van Heijningen Jr. must be a huge fan Jon Carpenter's original, because of how much precision and care is taken to make sure the two films link up PERFECTLY. Being a die hard fan of the original, I was like a fat kid in a fat kid store. Although the use of CGI automatically makes this film inferior to the original, the creature design is creepy, lovecraftian, and awesome. If you loved the original, you will at least like this film and appreciate the pieces of the puzzle revealed...if not..you probably just got something up your ass.

Lucio Fulci's Manhattan Baby

Ok so this one is not for everyone. I actually enjoyed it quite a bit, but its an acquired taste for sure. Ya see I love Fulci's zombie films, several times a year I re-visit Zombie, City Of The Living Dead, House By The Cemetery, The Beyond & Zombie 3.  Every time I watch his other films I find my self hoping for zombies to pop out.. I still like stuff like The New York Ripper & Cat In The Brain , but I dont love those films like his gothic trilogy. So I sort of slept on Fulci after going threw his zombie films. But after reading somewhere that many people bracket Manhattan Baby with his gothic films, I ran right to Movie Madness and rented it. What you get is kind of a Fulci stew, with plenty of steamy chunks of what could be deleted scenes from The Beyond... except with no zombies of course..although one could make the case that the reanimated flesh eating taxidermy birds count as zombies. In short, its worth a watch if your a Fulci dork.

Horror Express

After a chance encounter with this film in my younger days watching the Sci-fi cahnnel, I made sure to keep my eyes peeled for this title. Thankfully Laurie's Planet of Sound kicks ass when it comes to quality bootlegs. On the re-viewing I was pleased that all the creepy atmosphere was intact. I mean come on, Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Telly Savalas, a sasquatch possessed by an entity from space, a mad monk & zombies all crammed on a train racing through the cold dark night...what more could you ask for? A must see for the true Telly Savalas completist.


4 out of 5 kossacks
                                      

Monster Dog

Ahhh yes this is what happens when two masters of their craft meet and create a masterpiece. The two masters Im referring to are of course, Claudio Fragasso (who had his hand in directing Zombie 4 and parts of Zombie 3 apparently) & Alice Cooper (wearing fake teeth and overdubbed haha). Oh and its not really a masterpiece, but is a werewolf film I havent seen which is rare. Definitely the best thing Ive seen from Fragasso, Zombie 4 was terrible. If your a fan of werewolves this is a definite. At times the film is creepy, and the music video is pretty funny and infectious. Overall I recommend it for the lycanthrope completist.

The Sleeping Car

Mix one part Evil Dead, one part House, one part David "American Werewolf in London" Naughton, a splash of Kevin "UHF" McCarthy,and cram it all into a converted, haunted train sleeper car, you will get Douglas Curtis' "The Sleeping Car", a whatever 90's gory ghost story(thats also on the long list of horror flciks at 16 Thousand Movies(R.I.P.) I wasnt allowed to watch). A times the film does manage to brew up some atmosphere which is usually then scared away by the acting. There is a few good moments and several familiar faces supporting including Judie "Weird Science"Aronson and Jeff "Annoying as a Motherfucker" Conaway. Im a sucker for practical FX so I did enjoy this somewhat. The zombiefied corpse of "The Mister" is pretty awesome, and Kevin McCarthy's performance is good. Other than that there is alot of drag with Naughton spitting out tons of clunky dialogue. Its streaming on Netflix if you got the time...whatever..

I Sell The Dead

With a list of actors including Larry Fessenden (Who also produced),Angus Scrimm(of Phantasm fame), & Ron Perlman, theres not much you have to say to get me to watch this. Top it off with Dominic Monaghan, some zombies & vampires & theres even less to say to me than before when I mentioned those 3 actors I like.  Although it tries a little hard in spots overall this flick is very enjoyable, and all the key actors do thier damn thang. Its definitiely made by horror fans for horror fans. On top of that ths is the feature length debut of Glenn Mcquaid. I'd include this on that very small list(Dead Snow & Pontypool are the only others) of recent zombie films with a fresh approach to the genre, even though this isnt entirely a zombie film. Two nubs up!

Mario Bava's Planet of The Vampires

Wow. I love these moments. Moments when you realize you've been over looking an enormous talent and its time to play catch up. Such is the case with me and Mr Bava. Its even more interesting because im a big fan of Lucio Fulci &  Dario Argento, who are both obviously very influenced by the films of Bava. After passing this title up a million times as a kid I finally sat down and watched it last night. Its hard to make sci-fi spooky but boy does Bava accomplish just that. From the zombie like "Vampires", to the colors, the smoke, to the erie recorded voices of long dead alien giants, this flick lays it on thick. The plot would go on to be rehashed by many future films(roughly) such as "Alien" & "Creature" . Beautiful atmosphere and sets. Smashing stuff! This Bava fellow is really good.

Mario Bava's Black Sabbath (Anthology Series pt. 7)

Im here to inform and confess. First off this film is amazing, secondly, its the first Mario Bava film I've fully seen(seen half of Baron Blood). Yes I know, I know...and I call myself a fan of the genre? I know. But I plan on seeing the rest of his films. This film looks amazing, its quite a delight to the eye. I found myself alone,shirtless on my couch last night around 3am and I decided to pop this on my netflix. Damn. The first story gave me chills, which just doesnt happen that often. Second story was some good "When a stranger calls" type horror and the last story bousts Boris Karloff,the master himself, stepping into the role of vampire. Good stuff. From this one joint I can tell that Bava is without doubt a master of atmosphere and brooding terror. The use of sound in the first story(about a ghost attached to a certain ring) is top notch. More Bava going into the que immediately!

Reccomended for fans of Argento,Fulci, and Boris Karloff.

Visiting Hours

After reading Caelum Vatnsdal's "They Came From Within: A History of Canadian Horror Cinema", 'Visiting Hours"(directed by Jean Claude Lord) was on the top of my list of Hoser Horror to check out. Not because of Vatnsdal's review(he actually didnt give it much praise at all),but the combo of William Shatner & Michael Ironside was too much to pass up. The results are meh, not bad/ not great overall. The only real treat is Ironside really. The movie looks pretty good, some creepy shit in it. But I was definitely disappointed. Michael Ironside's performance is definitely worth checking out, but overall this is just for the avid slasher fan. Shatner is aight in it,hes no Rack Hansen though.

Recommended for fans of Canada.......the country in general.

-The Mark Of Quality- Wings Hauser-

AAAAAHHHHH yes, It is time for our second Edition of "The Mark of Quality", and what better way to honor this section then with one of the finest actors of all time? Wings Hauser. The man ,the myth, the legend. From his immaculate performance in Gary Sherman's Vice Squad to his breathtaking badassery in Nico Mastorakis's "The Wind" ...the man simply can do no wrong. Here is a list of films that utilize the acting talents of the one and only Wings Hauser!!!!!!!

1.Tales From The Hood
2. The Wind
3. Mutant (aka Night Shadows)
4. Nightmare At Noon (a loose remake of "Mutant" by Nico Mastorakis, review coming soooon!)
5. Watchers 3
6. Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time
7. The Carpenter
8. Vice Squad

Put some Wings Hauser deep inside your VCR now!!!!!!!

The Beast Within

Advertised on Netflix as a werewolf related film (but soon removed from the section when I double checked the next day), The Beast Within is more of a were-cicada film. Yeah thats right, were-cicada. The film starts off with a happily just married couple and their dog getting stranded on the side of the road, of course the husband volunteers to go get a tow from the nearest gas station, while his wife stays behind and protects the car in the middle of the creepy ass woods. Nearby, in a creepy old house, something breaks free of its chains and heads out into the night. The wifey's dog gets spooked so she lets it out of the car where it promptly runs off into the woods and gets killed by the approaching beast .The wifey gets out of the car to inspect ...then, OOPS! She gets raped by a were-cicada. 17 years later the couples son is acting strange, you know, like he may be the son of a were-cicada. He returns to the town where his mother was raped to find out about his true past. He soon begins to react to the moons cycle and the sound of the cicadas in the forest, both making him crave human flesh. Add in a teenage love interest and you gots yourself the makings of a fine, atmospheric, and entertaining little film. Props to director Phillipe Mora (who also directed The Howling 2 & 3).


for fans of Silver Bullet and cicadas.